I’m not encouraging him to get married, but it’s not completely in my hands either.Friends have told me that when it happens, it can happen quickly.
At my dad’s, I grew up with the concept of shomer negiah, literally “guarding touch,” a traditional practice that men and women (other than family) refrain from touching until marriage.
In practice, this meant I had uncle-like family friends I hadn’t so much as high-fived, and I was plenty familiar with the classic “sup” nod in lieu of a handshake.
The prohibition against physical contact with arayot is codified by Rishonim including Maimonides (Hilchos Issurei Biah 21:1) and the Moses ben Jacob of Coucy (Sefer Mitzvos Gadol 126), who note the consideration of whether the contact is done derekh [chibah v']taavah (דרך [חבה ו]תאוה) in a[n affectionate or] lustful manner.
The biblical etiology of Maimonide's prohibition is disputed by Nachmanides, who refers to the derivation from Leviticus 18:6 as an asmachta (a rabbinic prohibition with a biblical allusion) and not true exegesis.
The prohibition of negiah is derived from two verses in Leviticus: "Any man shall not approach (לקרב lekarev ) his close relative to uncover nakedness; I am God" (18:6), and: "You shall not approach a woman in her time of unclean separation, to uncover her nakedness" ().
The former verse is viewed by the Tannaim of late antiquity (70–200 CE) as referring to an expansive prohibition against "coming near" (קרב qarab) any of the arayot, or biblically prohibited sexual relations, which includes most close relatives.
To help prepare readers whose children are entering the world of (religious Zionist, or modern Orthodox) community in Israel.
Even with that limitation, there are many subgroups and I’m sure replies will vary widely.
Dear Jew in the City, I know it’s important to date and marry a Jewish man, but I’m having a really hard time finding quality Jewish men in my hometown!
Do I really have to move to LA, NY, or Israel to find my soul mate? However, we have been dating on and off for three years.
But what shomer negiah means on a larger scale is a person’s first hand-hold, kiss and anything beyond should be singular experiences with a chosen life partner.