Online dating continues to be an ever-growing, popular way to find love.
Unfortunately, some people online have less than romantic intentions. These are the folks who are just online to lurk, harass and waste everyone’s time.
I felt like hot shit, “Oh, this will be easy – I work at an online dating site, clearly I’m like the Hitch of online dating…” Will, he’s Hitch.
You swipe/click/poke/prod – they reciprocate, and then when it comes time to meet up, (s)he drops the bomb that they had no intention of actually meeting up – that “online dating is for losers and my BFF [presumably Jill] made me this profile for me as a joke.” Ways to avoid: Look out for too-much focus on “online” – if they keep harping on it, then it’s likely they have some self-security issues.
The irony of this type of flake is that they often claim that online dating is only for losers/weirdos – but then what does that make them – who claim to not be looking for something, but instead troll online dating sites for someone to talk to.
But our research, published in Personality and Individual Differences, found that some people who use these methods of finding love have a far more antisocial agenda.
I've already discussed how internet trolls in general are more likely to be male, and are more likely to have higher levels of "darker" personality traits, including nonclinical psychopathy and sadism.
Just ask the woman who unfortunately experienced a totally obnoxious man who swiped right just to call her fat. It was once thought that men were way more likely to troll online than women. A recent study from Lifehacker asked 357 Tinder users to fill out a questionnaire about their online dating behavior and asked “if they had trolled people on the app, sent any shock comments for a laugh, or if they enjoyed ‘griefing’ other people who access the app.” Their research found that women troll online dating sites just as often as men. Sadly, as long as the internet is around there’s going to be trolls.
We might as well learn to handle them with grace, right? Remember back in the day when your parents told you that the reason playground bullies act the way they do is because they feel bad about themselves? Trolls are basically playground bullies with laptops, smartphones and online dating accounts.One of the group's members was threatening to attack people, even throwing out the word "rape." Vanessa, 26, informed the group's administrator and the troll was banned.The next morning, Vanessa found that the troll had somehow tracked her down and sent her private messages.As a result, people who turned to their desktops – (yes, this was back in the ice age of big hardware) – were genuinely interested in finding a relationship, however long or short term that might be.I personally view this deluge of flakes as the single biggest threat to people taking this whole industry seriously – and while I write the following with a light heart and (hopefully) carefree tone – keep yourself in check next time you come across these monsters. Genus: Indeniabilitas Drivesmethefuckcraziensis Description/Habitat: You connect. (S)he looks cool, well-intentioned, and states that (s)he “find[s] this whole thing soooo awkward…” written throughout their profile.Lifehacker also says that, “In addition, these internet trolls are likely to be motivated by negative social rewards, meaning they are reinforced by creating a disruptive social environment.” Uh, yeah, so it’s totally not about you. If you return their vitriol by engaging in a name calling war, you’re essentially giving them exactly what they want.