When confronted with a woman who exudes strength the automatic reaction of some men is to fall into the whole “woe is me, she emasculated me” line of thought.
I believe there is a hidden reason some of these fights happen that is rarely discussed.
This hidden reason comes from the male half of the partnership. Without sounding cliché, men want to feel like “Men.” While we do not believe that there is a conspiracy afoot to kill off manhood, there is definitely a deep cultural anxiety that we are not allowed to be Men once married.
I never once felt emasculated or was made to feel small by my mother’s competence and strength.
I never feel that way today when I meet a woman in my personal or professional life who has what is called “ballbuster qualities” because I recognize that these are the same characteristics that are admired and lauded in men all over this country.
There are a broad range of reasons that justify fighting after a wedding.
Fighting may be caused by sudden commitment stress after months of intense planning, money and intimacy fears or even hangovers.The majority of married men in my practice tell me that marriage is emasculating. Instead of actually using the term “emasculation”, they say things like “Who am I? No, we are not referring to the stereotypical Cro-Magnon Man.We are talking about the New Millennial Man, but with the ages of old hunter instincts shamefully hidden away.There seems to be a lot of advice offered in the realm of how not to emasculate a man.When I set out to write this list I first wanted to understand what the general opinion looked like.the wedding they get into a big fight, and the honeymoon is suddenly ruined.